Authenticity as I See it

I feel that authenticity is a characteristic that is under-appreciated and also hard to find these days. I meet so many people assuming they are genuine, believing that they have only the best intentions. Unfortunately, I have learned that the majority of the time I am wrong. Most people have intentions, but they may not be so good. I learned that people will do anything to get ahead. Their ethics and morals fly out the window when it comes to making money, most of time. It's all about number one: not about everyone else, not about us, not about you. Most people just don't care. Which is why when you come across that person who truly cares, you should cherish them for all their worth. Every so often, I find someone who wants to help me, who genuinely cares about my well-being, and those are the kind of people I try to surround myself with. It's a waste of time caring about someone who will always only be looking out for number one. They aren't going to reciprocate any of your genuine feelings, so why waste the authenticity that you are completely entitled to on someone who couldn't give two shits? DON'T. Make it harder for yourself to trust people. To me, it's second nature because I automatically assume that everyone has good intentions. I have to stop assuming and start expecting the worst. I have to expect that you are not genuine until you prove to me that you are, not the opposite. I am grateful to have those in my life that have truly shown me what it is to care, to love, to help and to live. I mean honestly how can you live your life being fake all the time. It may be a little harder to set your standards and stick to them, but I feel like a good person doing it. I'm not saying that I am perfect or that it's even a feasible possibility. I'm just saying we should all strive to be the best, most authentic person we can. We are all interconnected somehow; every action you make affects others, whether you care about them or not. So why not start caring? It will make you and the others around you feel good. It will make you feel alive.

Yesterday I had a conversation with a woman who is one of the truest people I've ever met. She cried to me about her life. She was completely raw with me. She opened up to me with complete trust; she was more vulnerable than I had ever seen her. And in the whirl of tears and emotions, I felt something deep, something I haven't felt since my best friends moved away to California. I was living a genuinely real connection with someone, and I haven't allowed myself to do that in a long time. I have known my best friends for years now; this woman only recently came into my life. Her passion for communication and appreciation of my worth truly made me feel valued, not only as a friend but as a human being. This woman trusted me enough to share some of her deepest experiences with me and even include me in on one.

Another thing happened to me yesterday that struck me pretty deeply. When I was making a run to the convenient store, I decided to get cash back when I made my purchase. Well I was so exhausted, frazzled and consumed that I forgot to get my money. The cashier could have easily pocketed my $30, but instead he called after me. Just my lucky day I guess. I'm so thankful that he was an honest person, because my long day could have easily gotten much worse.

I feel as though those of us that have genuinely good intentions, get stomped on. It's like they say, "Nice guys finish last." And it's true it's easier to cheat your way through life, lie your way through a relationship or deceive someone to get your desired results, but it's definitely not easier on your conscience or your morals. I don't know how guilt doesn't eat away at those who are deceptive, sneaky, lying, cheating sketchballs. All I have to say is good luck in life. People will see through your façade, if they don't already.

In any case, I may be wrong. Maybe I'm the one with bad intentions, and I don't even know it. I don't feel that way though. I have to say that I feel good: about myself, about my actions, about my life.


P.S. This song gets me through the day, take a listen if you like:

Connect Four? No, Connect More.

Lately I have been contemplating the idea of interconnectedness. It has been presented to me in many ways in the last few weeks, and honestly before then, I had never really given the term a second thought. However, this concept is one of the biggest and greatest that one could grasp.

I had always believed that each person was an individual, each defined with a unique sense of self. I still believe that we are all unique, but I have been presented with this idea that we are all interconnected, and I can’t help but to start to see it that way. Hear me out. Every decision or action I make affects me, but it also affects those in relation with me. So if we are all interconnected… how is there so much hate and violence? Shouldn’t we all be trying to make ourselves better by making good decisions that we can all benefit from? To me, it seems like the logical decision, but not everyone sees it this way.

I want to take a minute to help, to put my ideas out there about how understanding this idea of interconnectedness can truly benefit all of us as human beings.
Reach out. Help someone. Be kind. We all have bad days; we all feel lonely at times, but we can help each other during those hard times. You are not alone; you are not the only one out there that feels the way you do! We are all fighting our own battles, and they are all equally as tough. So be kind to everyone you meet. Remember karma.
Become at peace. In Buddhist teachings, it is known that all humans will always be faced with suffering. Buddhists alleviate this suffering by practicing compassion for all living things. Now, I’m not saying that we should all adopt Buddhism, but we can all learn from its teachings. Compassion is a concept that is very lacking in the Western world. If we adopted the term more openly, I think that we may be a little better off. If we are compassionate about others when making decisions, we can begin to start making changes in the right direction. We need to learn to work with each other instead of against each other, unifying a common objective.
Stop. Breathe. Take five minutes each day or an hour each week to just stop. Just think. Contemplate on the last week. Think about your relationships, experiences and endeavors. Use your imagination. Get your mind off of the materialistic society we live in and delve into the parts of your life that cannot be paid for or accomplished. Consider how and who you have connected with.
Step into Nature. Because of our society’s unconditional craving for perpetual progress, our towns and cities have become considerably devoid of nature. So take a second to step off the manmade roadway. Visit a park; go to the beach; take a walk in your backyard. Find some way to associate yourself with all of the organisms living around us that we so hastily walk past or step on daily. Remember that we are just a small part of beautiful scene that surrounds us.

And with that said, I will conclude with a video that I discovered during the last week. It is part of the T-Mobile “Life’s for Sharing” campaign. Enjoy :)

Hello 2009

Well it’s been a while since my last update, but good things come to those who wait. Or at least that’s what they say. Anyways, with a new year rolling in to place, I have been thinking about my resolutions. I have really had a set one, just some ideas I was throwing around for the sake of making a resolution. And then I thought to myself why make one? Never in my life have I ever kept one of my new year’s resolutions. Never have I lost those 10 pounds or stopped eating chocolate or achieved whatever unrealistic goal I set for myself. So then I thought maybe I have just been making the wrong resolutions. So this year is going to be a little different.

This year my resolution is to live my life the way I want to live it. I want to make decisions in the moment, I want to do things on a whim, be spontaneous. I want to live freely without regret or responsibility to anyone but myself. I want to love myself, instead of trying to find someone worthy of all the love I have to give. I want to stop searching and just be. I want to take each day at a time for what it is worth. I want to recognize the importance of a bumble bee hovering over a flower. I want to take a minute each and just stop and take in the world around me.

My resolution this year is simple. I want to live.